I’ve just spotted that it’s International Fetish Day, so let’s grab a cup of coffee, take a break from whatever boring real-life stuff we’re doing, and take a moment to celebrate three unusual, filthy-hot fetishes.
Sometimes you’re horny and almost anything will do, and other times you have a really specific itch that needs to be scratched. While the technical definition of fetish points towards a fantasy object (or scenario, or item of clothing) that you simply can’t get off without, most of us have what I’m going to call a ‘soft’ fetish or two. Something that, while it’s not a vital part of your everyday sex life, pops into your filthy mind when you want to treat yourself to something a bit unusual.
I certainly have some of these, and below are three of my favourites. I wouldn’t describe myself as a ‘fetishist’ in any of these areas, but I can certainly understand their appeal for people, and I’ve had a fair go at each of them in the past.
On top of my general excitement when people who have a really specific kink get that kink fulfilled (is there anything sexier than seeing someone’s eyes grow wide when all their sex dreams come true at once? Hell no), I think that exploring fetishes can help us come to a better understanding of other people’s sexuality, as well as giving us inspiration for things we might fancy testing out ourselves.
So with that in mind, here are my three favourite fetishes. Whether you’re passionate about them, or just fancy dipping your toe in the water, I hope you can agree that they all have a deliciously deviant appeal.
For some people it’s the texture of smooth latex against their skin. For others it’s the appearance of it: naturally the tightest PVC skirt or pair of pants is going to look pretty damn spectacular. For me, though, the appeal of PVC and latex has everything to do with the sensation of tightness, and the wonderful sounds that it makes.
I once knew a guy who became aroused at the sound of someone snapping on a rubber glove. You know the medical ones? White and tight and springy to the touch? Something about that snap gave him a pretty special tingle, and so naturally I rejoiced in doing it as often as I possibly could. Personally, the snap pales into insignificance when compared with the delightful ‘thwack’ sound of someone getting spanked in PVC. Proof, if any were needed, that you don’t need to have a specific fetish for it to enjoy its many delights.
Hottest product (according to me): This amazing pair of latex panties, with in-built strap-on and internal dildo. If you disagree with my selection, there are other hot PVC/latex things to peruse, of course.
Impersonal examinations? Awesome doctor and nurse uniforms? Those hot rubber gloves again? Yeah, I’m definitely down with medical fetishes.
To be fair, I suspect there’s a pretty vast gulf between the medical play that happens in my head (why yes doctor I will remove all of my clothes and sit on your lap for this examination) and the more hardcore experience that genuine medical fetishists are after. But there are elements of this play that I suspect will be hot for a hell of a lot of people: plenty of people get a thrill from the idea of being examined or inspected – stripping naked and having someone appraise your body comes up in a lot of BDSM play as well as during medical fetish fantasies.
Hottest medical fetish product: without a doubt these Kinklab rubber grip forceps. Your doctor or nurse can use them in all manner of places, of course, but for me they say one thing: nipples. Ouch.
How can you have a sexual fantasy about not having sex? Easy! Whether you’re a hardcore fan of cock-cages or you just dabble in a bit of denial every now and then, chastity is hot because it builds you to the point where any kind of sex play is imbued with a hint of magic.
Remember when you first started kissing/touching/having sex? Every single touch someone would give you sent shivers through your whole body, and the idea of moving to the next step (whether that was first base, second base, or full sex behind the bike sheds) was so thrilling that you could barely control yourself. Sex, like everything else, loses a certain je ne sais quois when you’ve done it a hundred times, and chastity is a way of recapturing that joy.
As with the fetishes mentioned above, I don’t have a particular fetish for chastity, but I can more than understand why people love it. There’s nothing better than getting back from a holiday to find the guy I left at home trembling with lust and desperate to touch me, because I’ve told him he can’t have a wank in the week I’m gone. I’m sure he cheats, to be honest, but the effect is explosive anyway.
Hottest chastity product: I really like the look of this cock cage. Shiny, and gives you just enough of a peek inside that you can see when he’s hurting to be set free.
So there you have it – three fetishes that you can bring into your bedroom, taking the hottest elements from the ones you love and sharing them with the person you’re shagging. If none of these float your boat, but you’re looking for something new, then you could always try splosh (covering yourself/a partner in sticky, slippery, gooey substances like custard – great fun but be careful you don’t ruin the carpets) or something like BDSM.
BDSM leads me neatly on to the final point of this blog post. As you’re reading it, please imagine me dressed up like Jerry Springer and sitting on a stool to dispense advice, like he used to do at the end of each show. Often we can get so enthusiastic about fetishes that we forget not everyone has them – I’m guilty of this a fair amount myself. I get so wide-eyed and horny at the thought of, say, spanking, that in the rush I ride roughshod over those people who don’t think it’s fun at all. BDSM is a good example of this – it’s now seen almost as a ‘standard’ sex move, that will naturally be greeted with enthusiasm by everyone. While spankers and spankees like me used to worry that people would ‘discover’ our sexy secret, 50 Shades of Grey has pushed BDSM so far into the mainstream that these days people are often shamed for not enjoying a bit of spanking.
And while I’d bloody love for you to embrace some of the hot fetishes mentioned above, and play in exciting new ways with your partner, I’d never ever want to turn into one of those people who makes you think that a particular kind of sex is compulsory. So make sure that whatever you do you’re doing it because you love it, your partner loves it, and you both want to try it together. After all, fetish is a bit like Marmite: some people will love it, some will hate it, but no one wants it forced upon them.
Or maybe they do, but that’s a whole new fetish entirely.
The photo in this post is of the excellent Gimp man of Essex, who you should follow on Twitter because he brings a fetishy sparkle to everyday Essex life.