Christmas is over, and the more
organised among you might have finished putting away your tree and
decorations by now. If you’re anything like me, you’re probably
looking back on 2016 and thinking ‘well, that was a *&^ing
disaster, wasn’t it?’ Lots of our favourite celebrities left us,
there were divisive elections aplenty, and there’s nothing much to
look forward to in 2017 except more fake news and fights with
anonymous eggs on Twitter.
Still, there are some positive things:
most notably the January sex toy sale, which means you can treat
yourself to something wonderful, and still have money left over for
some wine if you’re not doing dry January. I’ve added a few
particular recommendations at the end of the post, but for now here
are 5 reasons to treat yourself in the
1. A sex toy is for longer than just
Your shiny new sex toy will be with you
long after you’ve shooed the family out of the door and polished off
your last mince pie.
2. It’ll get you through the coldest
time of year
January is the gloomiest month. But it
can be slightly less gloomy for you…
3. Had a good 2016? You deserve a
If you’ve managed to get through the
Worst Year without just throwing the towel in and deciding to live in
a cave, then congrats – you deserve a special reward!
4. Had a bad 2016? You need a
If, on the other hand, your year has
been so bad you’re hoping the 1
st January comes with an
‘undo’ button, join the club. And buy something lovely to take your
mind off it.
5. Some sex toys will double as handy
weapons, come the apocalypse
Now that you’ve got at least 5 reasons
to get your wallet out, here are a couple of things I picked out of
the sale to give you a bit of inspiration. But you can browse all the
sale sex toys here – and get up to 70% off!
50 Shades sex toys and BDSM kit
Like an unstoppable bondage juggernaut,
you cannot ignore the approach of 50 Shades Darker – the new film
in the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, set for release just before
Valentine’s Day this year. Whether you’re a bondage newbie who wants
to try some stuff out, or an old hand like me who just wants to take
advantage of the cheap toys and BDSM equipment on offer, there are
lots of 50 Shades toys in the January sale this year. From
(I bang on about it all the time because it’s soooo much
easier to use than rope) to
, grab something good and show Christian Grey that you
don’t need to own a helicopter to own in the bedroom.
Happy Lola Sexy Strap Things
They’re not really lingerie, and
they’re not really restraints – I’m kind of lost for words as to
what to call these straps from Happy Lola – like the
or these simple
. But I love them into a million pieces. They’re like
tiny outfits you wear, that frame some of the sexiest parts of your
body. And best of all they’re on sale for just a tenner, so you can
look like a million dollars without spending even 0.1% of that
Rocks-Off RO-JIRA vibrator
This one gets included because it’s
such a whopping discount. Rocks-Off, in case you’ve never heard of
them, make some incredible simple, powerful vibrators. They’re
designed to look nice, work well, and not break the bank.
is one of their more expensive ones usually, because it’s
100% waterproof and rechargeable. But right now it’s discounted from
£59.95 to £36, so pick one up quickly if you want to take advantage
of the discount. If your budget is on the tight side, then there’s
on sale – just £10, and it comes in a range
of cute colours.
Not seen what you want yet? Fear not –
there are lots more bargains on sex toys, lingerie, and essentials
like lube and condoms if you check out the sale page. And if your new
year’s resolution involves doing more of the sexy stuff you love,
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Header image via ell-r-brown on Flickr.