A question has been nagging away at the
back of my mind for a long time. Ever since I first started writing
for this blog, hunting out the latest intriguing sex news for you.
That question is this: why do we need scientific studies to give us
excuses to have more sex?
This week, I spotted a fantastic NHS
article that debunked a few rather dramatic headlines from last week.
The original headline in The Sun
claimed that “Scientists have found you can hold back the hands of
time with a regular romp” – a reference to a (very small) study
that showed a correlation between having had sex in the last week and
having longer ‘telomeres.’ Telomeres are protective tips on the end
of our chromosomes that shorten as we age.
NHS Choices website thoroughly debunked the headline
out that the scientists who ran the original study were very careful
not to make the kind of grandiose claims that the press were making.
So far, so normal: scientists do a
small study that might be linked to sex, press blows its wad early so
to speak, we all pop home and have a nice big shag just in case it
might make us younger.
But the question remains: why do we
need science to tell us to have sex?
Sex makes you stronger, faster, and basically superman
I’ve covered lots of these studies for
this blog before – the
that claim sex gives you superhuman memory powers
, or tell us
people have more sex
. And while it might be fun to announce to
your partner that sex will make you a better team in the pub quiz
next week, or that it’ll prove to your friends that you’re both nice
people, in reality we shouldn’t need these excuses.
Yet we keep searching for them anyway.
Humans are constantly fascinated by sex. We are in turns prudish
about it, yet also deeply curious. And those of us who enjoy it are
often ready to hunt down any old excuse.
So we – and the press – leap on these
small studies even when they don’t really say what we want them to
say. And we find new and bizarre reasons to have sex.
I find that quite comforting, because
it’s nice to know that there are so many people out there like me:
horny and always looking for a reason to get down to it. But at the
same time it makes me a little sad. Why do we need an excuse, other
than that sex is fun and we want to do more of it? Is our desire for
a scientific seal of approval a throwback to the old days when sex
was seen as shameful or pervy? Something which should be done only
for the purpose of procreation, and never for pleasure?
I hope not.
Non-scientific reasons to have sex
So in the name of anything-but-science,
here are five reasons to have sex that you don’t need a study to
5. There’s nothing good on telly.
New Game of Thrones isn’t out until
Sunday, after all.
4. There’s something sexy on telly, and
you want to try acting out the parts.
Use this excuse when Game of Thrones is
3. You’ve just bought an awesome new
sex toy and you want to try it out.
My current obsession – as I
mentioned on the blog last week
– is furry
tail butt plugs
. Because, well, meeeee-ow. But pick whatever you
like from the
sections – and you have a great excuse because this
week if you spend over £30 you get free shipping.
2. Your lover could do with cheering
Let’s face it, we all have crappy weeks
sometimes. Whether it’s been a stressful one for them at work, or
they’ve had to spend hours on the phone to their bank trying to sort
out an overdraft, or they just have that general sense of malaise
that comes during summer when you suspect everyone’s having more fun
than you are: a nice back rub and a hell of a lot of oral sex could
work wonders for their mood.
1. You’re horny.
This reason is very rarely announced in
newspaper headlines. It wouldn’t surprise many people to read that
‘Horny People Have More Sex!’ But it’s true: the number one excuse
for having sex is that you’re horny, and you want to enjoy yourself.
So this is me telling you to go ahead
and enjoy yourself: you don’t need a study to justify it.