This could be a really short blog post. I mean, how long does it take to type ‘yes please I would like a sex break at work’? Three seconds. There. But there’s a bit more to it than that – let’s examine this suggestion, which came from a Swedish politician, and how it could benefit you.
Firstly, the story: Swedish
politician Per-Erik Muskos suggested
this week that workers could
benefit from being allowed regular sex breaks at work. He’s proposed
that people in the town of Övertorneå (don’t ask me how to
pronounce that) should be allowed one hour off in the middle of the
day to go home and have sex with their partners.
Excited? I am. And I work from home, so
I can technically have sex whenever I like – as long as it consists
of having sex with myself, because my partner works in an office and
I don’t think they’d agree with Per-Erik that he can slip off halfway
through a meeting and run home for a vigorous shag.
The argument for sex breaks is that sex
itself is a healthy thing to do – instead of going for a casual
stroll on the way to buy your lunch, a bit of aerobic exercise in the
form of the karma sutra might help employees to stay healthy and
happy. Not to mention relieve some of their stress.
This isn’t a new idea – there have
been tongue-in-cheek proposals about sexy work breaks before, most
notably when sex toy manufacturers Hot Octopuss set up a
booth in Manhattan
for stressed office workers to… umm…
enjoy. It was more about marketing than masturbation though, and
according to our sources no one was quite brave enough to take them
up on the offer.
But if you were allowed an hour’s break
in the middle of your working day, would you use it to have sex? I
suspect that for many people, their commute to and from home might
make anything more than a quickie out of the question. It takes my
other half just over 40 minutes to get home, so the likelihood would
be that we’d have to meet somewhere halfway. And London transport
police might have a few objections to us banging in a station halfway
between my house and the centre of town. And if we opted to have a
quickie in the station toilets, there’s still the worry that someone
will knock from the side and ask us to pass through some toilet roll
– not the sexiest of scenarios.
Besides, what about people who don’t
have partners, or whose sexual body clocks mean that lunchtime isn’t
a particularly horny time? It’s surely a fair better idea if the hour
break can be used for anything – masturbation, going for a walk,
having a little snooze, scrolling through Facebook to see which of
your friends are posting smug post-sex-break selfies… you get the
So: sex breaks at work are an excellent
idea, but they need to be expanded out to make sure everyone can join
in, and do something they particularly enjoy – not necessarily sex
with their partner. What kind of sex could you have if your boss
started offering the sex break service?
Couples cock rings – for stimulating
If you’re time-limited then you might
be on the lookout for a sex toy that speeds things along. Personally,
if I’m after a quick orgasm, I like to combine penetration and
vibration to make sure I reach climax.
are one of the simplest and neatest solutions to this
– meaning I can have the delicious grinding sex with a bullet vibe
pressed against your clit, and he gets to feel my orgasmic spasms
squeezing him tightly.
Remote control – when you need to
keep it secret
Some of you are going to run into the
same problem as me and my other half: you can’t actually have sex
because you’d end up meeting somewhere very public. For those
occasions, you want a sex toy that gives subtle stimulation, of the
kind no one has to know about.
! One of you puts the toy down your pants (or inside you,
or around your penis, depending on the toy) and the other holds the
remote control. Once you’ve nailed the basics of controlling it, all
you need to learn is how to avoid making faces that’ll give the game
Anything you like – when it’s all
Single people, or those who can’t make
it to a partner in time, shouldn’t be left out of the ‘sex break’
siesta – whether it’s your favourite
, or the biggest
dildo you can find
, there’s something to enhance everyone’s solo
Sadly it doesn’t seem likely that UK
companies will offer shag breaks any time soon. But we can dream,
can’t we? And although you might be a bit down about the lack of a
midday wank-fest, I do have some news to cheer you up: until midnight
on Sunday SexToys.co.uk is having a 25% off sale – massive
discounts on anything your heart (or penis, or vagina, or bum) could
possibly desire. Use the code SEX25, and get in there quick!