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What gets you in the mood?

If you want to keep your sex life alive and buzzing, it’s good to know what gets you in the mood, what turns you on. Everyone is different and what floats your boat may be completely different to the next person. The better you know yourself and what you need to get your sexy on, the more likely you are to have a fantastic sex life.


Often, it is stimulation of our senses that starts to create that warm, fuzzy feeling in our bodies. Some people are more visual or more tactile for example. Most people enjoy a combination of things. Do you know what works best for you? Here are some ideas for you to play with to discover more about what gets you going:

Sight – Let’s face it, seeing your partner’s naked body waiting for you on the bed is a lot sexier than seeing the dishes piled up next to the sink. What other sight’s do you find sexy? A certain look from your Beloved? Fresh flowers waiting for you when you get home? Porn?

Sound – Music is a great way to get yourself in the mood. Try different tracks for different moods of sex. For example, something very slow and sensual for cuddling, slow dancing and general seduction. Maybe something more upbeat and arousing for more passionate action?

I particularly love the sound and wild energy of a thunderstorm. Nothing like tuning into Mother Nature’s passion to get you going! I also love the sound of my Beloved’s voice. Especially when he’s telling me all the naughty things he wants to do with me!

Taste – Food doesn’t necessarily have to be an aphrodisiac to put you in the mood. If something about the taste of a particular food whets your sexual appetite, then go for it! It’s well known that certain things like oysters, strawberries or chocolate work well, but how about avocados, almonds or figs? Whatever works for you is the important thing.

Smell – There is tons of scientific evidence to show that our sense of smell is one of the big players in terms of arousal. What one person rates as a sexy smell might differ greatly from another person. For example, although I don’t drink it, I love the smell of coffee. Gets me going almost every time! However my partner hates the smell of coffee. I love the smell of fresh sweat on my partner, but other folk think that’s gross. Some people love certain perfumes or colognes, whereas I can’t stand any of them. A good way to explore scent is to try different scented candles or massage oils.

Touch – Last but most certainly not least is touch. Touch can be one of the most arousing of all the senses. So much can be communicated through touch. A dominant hand on your lower back, a soft, gentle caress of your cheek, a deep passionate kiss. Touch also starts to stimulate nerve endings in our skin which in turn send pleasurable or not so pleasurable messages to the brain. What sort of touch to you like to receive? What parts of your body like to be touched? What do you like to be touched with? Silk, satin, feathers, floggers, your partner’s body?

There are also lots of things not directly related to the senses that might get you in the mood. How about sexy texts or a saucy letter? Reading or writing erotica or telling your partner naughty stories?

It’s important to remember that turns you on in one moment might not work another time. We all have different moods and our needs and desires change accordingly. Keep exploring and discovering new things that turn you on all the time and you’ll never get bored or stuck sexually!

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