Week 3 of the ‘A-Z of Sex’ brings us to the letter ‘C’. Can you think of any more to add to the list?
Clitoris – Ah, the mysterious clitoris! Just possibly the most important part of a woman’s body since its sole purpose is pleasure! While the penis has 4000 sensory nerve endings, the clitoris is rich with 8000 sensory nerve endings! Yes, for most women, this really is the magic button.
What many folk don’t realize though is that the clitoris isn’t just the pea-sized button that protrudes from just under where the major labia meet. That is just the head and external part of the clitoris. The rest of the clitoris splits off into two ‘legs’ that are tucked into the major labia either side of the vulva. Although not quite as sensitive as the head, these legs of the clitoris also provide lots of pleasure and stimulation.
As for how to pleasure a woman and her clitoris, well, that is for another article or even better, for you to do some investigative work of your own!
Condom – What a wonderful invention! A condom is a great way to help prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases all at the same time. Usually made of latex or polyurethane, a condom provides a protective barrier between a penis and wherever that penis might make contact. Condoms come in all sorts of sizes, colours and flavours. Unless you are fluid-bonded to the person you are having sex with and using a different form of birth control, you need to be using a condom whenever you are having sex. I’ll write more about the fabulous condom in a later article.
Cock – A slang word for penis. You knew that already, didn’t you? I’ll say more about cocks when we get to ‘P’ for penis.
Cunnilingus – The delicious act of using your mouth, tongue and lips to pleasure a woman’s vulva and clitoris. Kissing, licking, sucking and even nibbling the various parts of a woman’s genitals can be very erotic and intimate for both partners. Try it in different positions, before during and even after penetrative sex or just on it’s own for her delight!
Consent – Quite possibly the most important, sexiest word in the whole A-Z of sex. Consent is a person’s agreement, approval and permission. Consent is what keeps us safe in everyday sexual experiences as well as allowing us to expand and explore our sexual boundaries. Consent is essential for both or all parties when sharing sexual activities. Consent applies whether you are on the giving or receiving end of what is happening and can be mental, physical, emotional and more. Do you consent to receiving what you’re receiving? Do you consent to giving what you’re giving? Consent is a moment-to-moment thing, not something that once given is unretractable. Consent for one thing does not at all mean consent for something else. Just because you’re happy to kiss and make out with someone does not mean you are consenting to further sexual activity, or to kissing them at another time. You are not obliged EVER to do anything you don’t fully wish to do. Consent is often more subtle than just a YES or NO. Be mindful of people’s words and also their actions. Be mindful of your own feelings and intuitive sense of what feels right and what doesn’t. If you’re unsure, ask! Always better to stop or slow down proceedings to be sure everyone is in consent rather than have things go tits up later on. With consent from both or all parties, everyone can relax and enjoy getting their sexy on!
Contraception – The term contraception refers to a variety of methods for stopping a woman from becoming pregnant. There are at least 15 different forms of contraception available in the UK. Each has their pros and cons and every woman must find what suits her best. Some common forms of contraception are condoms (see above!), the contraceptive pill, diaphragms, hormone injections and even the rhythm method. If you are looking to use contraception, speak to your GP and do lots of your own research as well. Getting the right contraception for you and your circumstances will give you peace of mind and keep you healthy too.
CBT – An acronym for ‘cock and ball torture’. Cock and ball torture refers to ‘torture’ of a man’s genitals through a variety of methods. This might include flogging or spanking of the genitals, pinching, squeezing, piercing, biting, bondage, wax play and much more. Some men like to engage in this sort of activity because they enjoy the ‘pleasure in the pain’ and some men like to please their partner who may in a dominant role. Obviously safety is very important so if you’re new to CBT, take it slowly, educate yourself and be in constant communication with your partner. Always maintain good circulation to and from the genitals and be aware of ‘bad pain’ as opposed to ‘good pain’.
Cunt – A fabulous and much debated word that refers to a woman’s vulva. The word cunt has been thought to be vulgar and obscene for centuries and its origins are sketchy at best. I once heard that a ‘cunt’ was originally the sheath that a Roman soldier kept his sword or dagger in. Can’t seem to find any evidence of that, so who know? Sadly, it has become widely used as an expletive and a way to demean someone. Fortunately lots of folk are reclaiming the word and making it back into the powerful, sacred and beautiful word that it is. How do you feel about the word cunt?
Cuckold or cuckolding – Cuckolding is a particular sexual fetish that involves a married man or man in a committed relationship being forced to watch or hear his partner have sex with another man, who usually called the ‘bull’. Some people include various methods of humiliation as part of their cuckolding.
Chastity and chastity devices – Chastity is stopping or having control over a person’s sexual possibilities, and access to their own genitals. This can be for a particular scene or over a prolonged period of time. Typically, a man would have a dominant partner who holds the key to his chastity device and they would decide when to remove it.
Cyber sex – Cyber sex generally refers to a virtual sexual encounter that happens via computers. It could occur through instant messages, email, Skype, webcams and more. Participants typically walk each other through a sexual scene or fantasy while self-pleasuring. It has its pros and cons depending on what you’re into. It’s a great way to maintain sexual contact with a distant lover or partner and can be a real thrill. It’s also a great way to avoid STI’s! Obviously, though it’s just not quite the same as having your lover right there in front of you with the added benefit of touch!