Cool and unusual vagina art

Continuing my series on what I’ll loosely term ‘art as an excuse for perving on things’, allow me to present three awesome art projects fully inspired by the beauty of the vagina. These links aren’t safe for work, but if you work in an area that’s vaguely creative, you can always claim ‘artistic inspiration’ if your boss is looking over your shoulder.


The great wall of vagina

I’ve never been one to do things half-arsed, so let’s get stuck in with one of the most detailed vaginal artworks I’ve ever seen: the Great Wall of Vagina. The team who produced this spent a very long time casting individual women’s genitals, and then creating ‘panels’ of vag – composite works that included a number of different casts. The aim of the art project is to change people’s ideas about female body image, and I think they do bloody well in their mission.

As a woman, I have naturally spent my entire life wondering whether I’m too fat/thin/tall/short/funny-looking, and those worries extend to my labia as well. Are they too big? Too small? Too… different? In my rational mind I know that as long as I’m healthy it’s basically OK, but despite the constant lustful assertions by my partner that I’ve got a ‘really pretty c**t’, worry lingers at the back of my brain.

It’s not my fault – society and the media still rules that women need to look a certain way, and if you don’t then you need to be ‘corrected.’ Looking at the walls of vulvas presented for this project, it hits you really starkly that, yeah, everyone’s different. Nothing makes it clearer than to have those differences directly in front of you.

 

Painting with your vagina

As anyone with a vagina knows, they are brilliantly versatile things: fun things to wank with, baby highways, pencil holders* – you name it. And as one Swedish artist discovered, you can also use them for painting!

Artist Milo Moire injects eggs with coloured dyes, spreads a large sheet of paper on the ground, then ‘plops’ the eggs out of her vagina to create blobs of colour, and a hell of a lot of strange looks. I’d give you more description on this but, to be honest, even my brain – which is never easily at a loss for words – is struggling to come up with a good way to explain this. The Guardian described it as ‘absurd, gratuitous, trite and desperate’ but I think that’s a pretty harsh analysis. If I had one word to describe it, I think I’d choose ‘mesmerising.’ Here’s a video.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wKFZOIv5sS0]

*please don’t actually use your vagina as a pencil holder. Ouch.

Let’s give the clitoris some love too

I’m going to lay something pretty awesome on you now, and if you haven’t ever seen the MRI scan of the clitoris, then one look will be enough to blow your mind. A friend showed me this picture a long time ago, and it sat in my head for weeks, refusing to budge. It was a revelation, and one that meant any future orgasm would always seem different, as I tried to feel exactly how it was pushing through every bit of my clitoris.

Behold, the truth: the yellow part is the clit, and it’s like an iceberg – there is much much more beneath the surface.

 

This scan was taken a few years ago, and is considered to be one of the first real explorations of the internal clitoris. In short, the clit is not just a tiny organ poking out at the top of the vulva: it’s big, and it surrounds the internal organs, spreading throughout the pelvis and upwards as well as back towards the rectum. If you’re reading this, and you have a clitoris of your own, close your eyes and imagine the feeling of coming. Can you feel those waves pushing up from the pit of your stomach? That’s what I felt over and over again once I’d seen this picture. Maybe part of it is psychosomatic, but when I saw this picture it made sense of much of my experience of orgasm.

The next artwork pays homage to the not-so-humble clitoris, in one of the most public ways. Artists Roxy Topia and Paddy Gold have created a huge sculpture of a clitoris, which is being displayed at the Folkestone Fringe festival.

All the above artworks are awesome, and I say this as someone who knows absolutely nothing about art whatsoever. In my opinion, art is either ‘pretty good’ or ‘something I could do myself’ and therefore probably a bit rubbish. Spotted anything amazing in terms of vagina-based art? Drop us a link in the comments. To be honest, anything has got to be better than the most disappointing vagina sculpture in the known universe. It’s at the Tate Modern, and it’s by surrealist artist Marcel DuChamp. Called ‘Wedge of Chastity’, it is supposed to represent the human vagina, but to me it looks more like a paperweight covered in chewing gum.

Not sure I’ll ever get the hang of this art thing.

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