FREE NEXT DAY SHIPPING WHEN YOU SPEND £30 - ENDING IN T & C's Apply Dismiss

3 different kinds of sexy surprise – and how to pull them off

What makes the perfect sexy surprise?
Timing is definitely key – you don’t want to surprise someone with
a romantic, candlelit bedroom if they got home from work so tired
they just want to fall asleep. Nor do you want to send a saucy snap
when they’re in the middle of a family outing.

On top of timing,
you’ve got to pick something that they’ll actually like: the most
surprising sexy gifts have to be ones that speak to their fantasies
as well as yours. It can be tricky. But feel free to learn from my occasional successes and all-too-frequent mistakes: here’s my guide on sexy surprises.

1. The ‘sexy lingerie’ surprise

I’ve done this a couple of times:
bought a new piece (or pieces) of
sexy lingerie, then spent a while
hoisting myself into them before heading for a boyfriend’s house in
the hope of tempting him into bed.

The first time I did it, I failed on
the most crucial aspect: timing. Having squeezed myself into a sexy
basque and hooked my
stockings to the suspenders, I put all my clothes on over the top in preparation for a strip tease surprise. It was before we all had mobile phones, so I couldn’t exactly text him before I started getting dressed just to check that
he was in the right mood: I had to wing it.

So as I
pulled off my clothes in his bedroom to reveal my sexy look, I was expecting him to fall to his knees and gasp in erotic delight when he saw the get-up I was wearing. Sadly, he wasn’t quite prepared: he
announced awkwardly that he’d made plans and we had to leave the house. Which probably would have been fine if I hadn’t already got halfway to naked before he decided to tell me. To make matters worse, his dad was giving us a lift on this particular night out, so I had to sit through the longest car journey of my life, in a car with my father-in-law, wearing itchy stockings and a big red blush of humiliation.

Lesson learned: always check on
someone’s horniness levels (and diary appointments) before you bother
putting on suspenders. My tactic now, if I want to show off some
particularly lovely knickers or a truly wonderful corset, is to wait
until I’ve spoken to the person and made sure they’re in the right
move before I do the big reveal.

2. The ‘new sex toy’ surprise

This one’s my favourite, because I am
like a kid in a sweet shop with new sex toys, and so is my other
half.

The key thing with new sex toys is to
pick something that they’ve given you an indication they like, or
that is a natural follow-on from things you’ve bought before. If they
adore using that
bullet vibrator on you, chances are they might enjoy
a vibrating
cock ring too – similar lovely vibrations, but slightly different
way to deliver them. If they liked this or that
masturbation sheath,
a new kind with a slightly different texture will probably go down a
storm.

One of my favourite birthday presents
was a gorgeous
glass butt plug that my partner bought me by surprise.
It was just the right size (as tested by gauging all our other butt
plugs and remembering which was my favourite), and it was just
different enough that I was excited about using it: not more of the
same stuff we had, just a twist on an old favourite.

If you’re fairly new to sex toys, then
a bit of pre-planning is important, and don’t be afraid to be direct.
It’s always better to have an explicit conversation – “if I were to
get you something sexy, what would you like?” – than to guess and
end up getting something that’s a huge turn-off. Maybe even sit down
with them in front of the Sex Toys website and get them to bookmark a
few things they’re curious about. As long as you leave enough of a
gap between that conversation and your surprise gift, they’ll
probably have forgotten that conversation. Or maybe that’s just me
and my bad memory.

3. The playful surprise

This one’s an especially good bet in
winter, when it’s cold outside and nights in spent under the duvet
are especially tempting. The playful surprise usually comes with a
raised eyebrow and a ‘how about it?’ – it might be a
sexy game, a
filthy DVD, or a bottle of scented massage oil so you can play your
own dirty homemade version of Twister.

The key thing being, of course, that
it’s equally surprising for both of you – a journey of discovery
you can go on together. Sex, after all, is meant to be fun: we don’t
always have to be whipping each other with floggers and a straight
face, or ‘blowing their mind in bed’ with tantric moves that involve taking ourselves too seriously.

The best playful surprise I’ve ever
pulled off came at the hands of a
lube company. I’d been to an event
to launch their new ‘sensation’ lube – which was designed to tingle
delightfully when you put it on your junk. Returning home after a few
cocktails, I challenged my other half to put the lube to the test: if
I could give him a handjob and get him to come in under three
minutes, we’d declare the lube successful. Both of us – and the
lube – were winners.

If you like playful surprises too,
you’ll probably like the
Sex Toys secret swag bag – £50 worth of sexy
presents, for just £24. The beauty of this is that you and your
partner get to delve through the bag of goodies together: finding out
just what’s inside, and planning together how you’re going to use it. And in case you need a bit of extra encouragement to pick up a sexy surprise – until Sunday the code SEXTOY20 gets you 20% off at the checkout.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *