I’m not interested in kinky sex – is there something wrong with me?

Dear Rebecca,


My friends and I have been talking a lot more openly about sex since we all read that book. Some of them were already fairly ‘kinky’ and some have tried new things since reading the book. It’s making me feel like something is wrong with me though because I just am not interested in ‘kinky’ stuff. The sex I have with my partner is good and I don’t feel the need to add pain or handcuffs to make it better. Is there something wrong with me?

Thanks,

Caroline

Hi Caroline,

Thank you for your email. I get a lot of questions similar to yours these days, so let me start by saying, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you! It’s wonderful that you and your friends can talk openly about sex, just be careful not to compare yourself to everyone else. You probably don’t have the same hair style or wear the same clothes as your friends and you don’t have to be having the same kind of sex either.

If you’re happy with your sex life then there is no need to try something you’re not into or worry that you’re doing something wrong. What gets one person hot and steamy is different to the next person. If you want to expand your sexual repertoire there are plenty of ways to do that without going down the kinky route.

I would also add that that book is not really a true depiction of how beautiful, healing, blissful and transformational ‘kinky’ sexual exploration can be. It’s absolutely ok if kinky isn’t your thing, but don’t write it off just because of that book. If you ever find yourself interested, do some research and get informed. You may be surprised to find something that interests you or turns you on. And it’s absolutely ok if it’s not your thing at all too.

With love,

Rebecca

 

 

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *